Well, here it is. I am officially a mom of a tween and over a decade into this parenting thing. Wow. I really thought it would take longer to get here. To be honest, I’ve fretted over this phase of parenting. So many parents who have gone before have warned me of the abrupt attitude shift. Well, that’s definitely here, too. I have a child who is now fully capable of recognizing my mistakes (and pointing them out), rationalizing why her way is most likely better, and trying on what type of person she would like to become. This age also brings quite the mix of highs, lows, and in betweens with regards to emotions. And this is just the beginning. It’s definitely a challenge, and I have a choice to make.
I picture my child riding a roller coaster for the very first time: the upside-down-drop-you-40-stories kind. She’s finally ready, but super nervous. All her friends are getting on, and she wants desperately to experience this. I’m ready to turn and run, but I see that my girl needs me. Sure, I could send her off with friends or with another mom, but I know I will regret it. I could hold her back and refuse to let her go, but she would miss so much. I get on with her, and help her buckle. I pull the bar down and tell her as best as I can what she is about to experience. The loud sound of all the bars locking into place inform us there’s no turning back now. Excited, yet nervous chatter can be heard behind and in front of us from friends, some riding with their mothers, some alone, some with other friends, or other adults.
In the most calm voice I can muster, I tell her it’s going to be okay- no, it’s going to be awesome. With a sudden jerk, we are off. My girls’ eyes are wide; both of our hands are shaking. After adjusting to traveling at an extremely high speed, we begin laughing, settling into this fun ride. All too quickly the ride begins to spin us upside-down and right-side-up repeatedly. I remind my girl of the strong buckle/bar combination, and tell her the spinning is almost over. We both relax when we return to “normal” (you know, 120 mph).
Then we spot the wooden mountain looming in front of us. Terrified, she yells, “I had no idea it was this tall!” Quite unnerved myself yet determined to help, I tell her this will be one of the most thrilling experiences she will ever have. We reach the top, and in the brief pause I instruct, “Remember, you are secure within these restraints. Trust in them and determine to focus on the amazing. Look at that beautiful sky! You’ve never been this close to it before. This view is sensational! Throw your hands in the air, and get ready for the most incredible sensation! I love you, baby, and I’m right here!”
With that, we plummet to the bottom. A short moment later, we are exiting the ride. Both wind-blown and breathing heavy, we smile at each other with an unforgettable experience behind us.
I know I may be a dreamer, and I have just barely even begun this whole journey. Readers of this may be muttering about how I have no idea what’s coming. But there are a few things I do know:
1. I will be the one with my girl through this entire adventure if the Lord is willing.
2. I will do my best to give her wise advice, instructing her in how to trust and follow Christ through every high and low.
3. I will do my best to be positive and speak life over her, never expecting her to be like today’s typical teenager, but instead instilling in her that God has amazing things planned for her.
This precious girl is already attempting to set herself apart. She will tell you she struggles with pride (like her mom), among other things, but that she wants people to experience God through her ministry that is just beginning. My role is to continue to point out that which is God-honoring, and that which can seem innocent but actually be destruction in disguise. I know my God and that He is capable of directing this beloved daughter of His down a path where so many have gone astray.
Father, thank You for my most precious gifts. I pray that my children be tender to You and willing to follow wherever You lead. Continue to grow my relationship with them that they may take my direction and advice as they travel through uncharted territory. Grant me the ability to model joy and humility everyday. And then, Father, may they emerge from childhood and adolescence confident in who they are in You and determined to follow Your every command. In Jesus’s name I pray, amen.
“Now to him who is able to do far more abundantly than all that we ask or think, according to the power at work within us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, forever and ever. Amen.” Ephesians 3:20-21