Well, Easter is upon us again, and I’ve let time get away from me as usual. Do you ever find yourself saying, “I’ll do it next Easter?” I don’t know what “it” is for you, but there’s always something for me. Every year I intend to celebrate each day of passion week, memorize certain scriptures with my children, and spend a little extra time dwelling on all Jesus gave for us- for me. However, my schedule isn’t much different than last year.
I’ve been reading about the death of Jesus in Matthew for the past few days (something I try to do each Easter), and was overwhelmed by the many accounts of betrayal, rejection, and abandonment just within chapters 26 and 27. It’s heartbreaking. There was the betrayal by Judas, the three denials from Peter, and the rejection of the Jews and high priests; however, the one that really got me was that of the disciples in the Garden of Gethsemane. Jesus asked the disciples to stay in the garden and pray as He would soon be apprehended and led to His death. At one of the most crucial times, they fell asleep. They wake up and try again, only to fall asleep again.
That could have been me. That IS me. How often do I get passionate about giving Christ my all but get distracted by trivial things- even sleep? I begin to pray and suddenly I’m thinking about my upcoming activities or my to-do list. I pull out my Bible to read and remember the laundry I left in the washer. Or I hit the Bible app button but decide to check my email before I get started. Sometimes, I fall asleep mid- sentence while talking to God or reading His Word.
Oh how thankful I am that Jesus knew and fought for me anyway! He is aware of my abandonment and still gave up everything for me. He chose torture so that when I choose my pleasure over Him, I can be forgiven and saved. While I was yet a sinner, Christ died for me. No other love compares to His love.
I want to fight my desires for pleasure in order to pursue Him. I want to give up my own way to completely follow His path. When my mind wanders (and it will), I want to redirect my thoughts. When I’m tempted to put my time with the Lord second to everything else, I want to choose Him first.
Though my schedule hasn’t slowed down this year, I am attempting to direct my thoughts and those of my family to our Savior in every available moment I get. I’m hanging up the crafts and “extras” to focus on our relationships with the Lord. In a perfectly planned agenda, I’d be able to do both, but I’m admitting defeat in this area. We are reading Exodus this week and discussing the Passover. On Friday, we will begin reading in Matthew about the death and resurrection of Jesus. Oh the great discussions we have when we read a chapter and talk about things the Lord is impressing on our hearts. I love how the kids relate certain scriptures to other events in the Bible or to personal struggles. This is truly one of my favorite parts of the day. We have also been searching for worship songs to play in our home that fill our hearts with thanksgiving. We may not reach our goal as unforeseen activities wiggle their way into our days, but that’s not the point of this endeavor. I pray that we simply but inexplicably experience the fullness of Christ this week.
Father, You are gracious, forgiving, and unbelievably loving. Forgive me when I abandon You for ease and temporary pleasures. Redirect my heart back to you when I wander. Thank You for Your undeserved mercy and for the incredible sacrifice You made for me. Keep me in Your will, always pursuing You over everything else. Lord, allow me and my family to experience Your fullness by way of the immeasurable grace You lavish on us. In Jesus’ name I pray, amen.
“Then Jesus went with His disciples to a place called Gethsemane, and He said to them, ‘Sit here while I go over there and pray.’ He took Peter and the two sons of Zebedee along with Him, and He began to be sorrowful and troubled. Then He said to them, ‘My soul is overwhelmed with sorrow to the point of death. Stay here and keep watch with Me.’ Then He returned to His disciples and found them sleeping. ‘Couldn’t you men keep watch with Me for one hour?’ He asked Peter. ‘Watch and pray so that you will not fall into temptation. The spirit is willing, but the flesh is weak.’ He went away a second time and prayed, ‘My Father, if it is not possible for this cup to be taken away unless I drink it, may Your will be done.’ When He came back, He again found them sleeping, because their eyes were heavy. So He left them and went away once more and prayed the third time, saying the same thing. Going a little farther, He fell with His face to the ground and prayed, ‘My Father, if it is possible, may this cup be taken from Me. Yet not as I will, but as You will.’ Then He returned to the disciples and said to them, ‘Are you still sleeping and resting? Look, the hour has come, and the Son of Man is delivered into the hands of sinners. Rise! Let us go! Here comes my betrayer!'” Matthew 26:36-46
“But God demonstrates His own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.” Romans 5:8