In June our family received our newest little gift from the Lord. When we first found out we were expecting, I began praying that God would give us a name as He did with our last two pregnancies. Isaiah was mentioned and soon stuck with the kids, who all began calling the baby by this name before Jason and I had even settled on it. To be honest I never would have chosen this name if it hadn’t been for the meaning and the fact that it’s one of my favorite books of the Bible. Isaiah means “God is salvation” or “God is my salvation.” Little did I know how this meaning would play out in the months to come.
In the moments before I delivered at the hospital I opened my Bible to read my daily passages. The crazy thing was that I was in Isaiah at the time. I didn’t pick this book out- it was just in the order of my progressing through the Bible. But what is even crazier is that I was again in exactly the same spot as I was when I delivered Jacob almost four years before! The verses I was given when I first found out I was expecting Jacob were Isaiah 44:3-5, and then they “just so happened” to be my daily Bible reading on the day of his birth. Amazing. Only God could orchestrate all these “coincidences.” Now here I was waiting to deliver Isaiah and reading Isaiah 43 and 44 again, and God seemed to highlight some verses in my mind that connected the baby’s names with His Word. (We had chosen Joel as a middle name, which means “Yahweh is God.”)
Isaiah (“God is my salvation”): “I, even I, am the Lord, and apart from Me there is no savior. I have revealed and saved and proclaimed— I, and not some foreign god among you. You are My witnesses,” declares the Lord, “that I am God. Yes, and from ancient days I am He. No one can deliver out of My hand. When I act, who can reverse it?” Isaiah 43:11-13
Joel (“Yahweh is God”): “Do not tremble, do not be afraid. Did I not proclaim this and foretell it long ago? You are my witnesses. Is there any God besides me? No, there is no other Rock; I know not one.” Isaiah 44:8
As a Christian, I know that God is my salvation. It is the whole basis of my faith. And yet expecting and delivering a baby during the harrowing year of 2020 revealed some thoughts and actions that proved I did not fully believe it. Fears of contracting COVID, fears that my baby’s breathing was compromised when he was sent to NICU, fears that I wasn’t healing correctly after surgery, eye abnormalities, hearing problems, jaundice concerns… these are just a few of the many scares over which I fretted. It seems each week there was another issue that brought me to my knees asking God to deliver me from my lack of trust. “Lord, help my unbelief!” God allowed each incident to occur, knowing what would draw me to Him and keep my wandering heart from straying throughout this time. With each situation He has whispered, “I am your salvation.” Every time I have been concerned about Isaiah, God has reminded me, “I am his salvation.”
As we were getting ready to leave the hospital, a young man showed up to help us get to our vehicle. I had been expecting the nurses with whom I was familiar, but it seems the hospital has now hired escorts for this particular job. Nothing could have prepared me for this little adventure. The young man never smiled, and he seemed angry at the world. I had to be left alone with him while Jason retrieved our van. Two-day-old Isaiah was snug in his car seat right beside this man, while I sat in a wheel chair next to him and our luggage at the entrance to the hospital, where no one else was present at the time. The man smelled strongly of cigarette smoke, which concerned me due to Isaiah’s breathing complications. Suddenly he began speaking loudly about how much he hated his job, how awful his ex wife was, and how ridiculous he found these COVID precautions that were required of him as an employee of the hospital. He ripped off his mask and stated, “If I was going to get COVID I would already have it. My first three patients of the day were COVID patients!” (I’m editing his language.) I wanted to scream at him and run away at the same time. I wanted to snatch my baby up and never look back at that hospital. But somewhere inside my chaotic thoughts, I sensed the Lord saying, “I am your salvation. I am Isaiah’s salvation. And I am this man’s salvation. I care about him, too.” I knew I had to share the hope of my salvation with him. As if on cue, he suddenly switched topics and asked me what we had named the baby. God opened the door wide for me to share what Isaiah Joel means. He smirked and said, “So y’all must be real religious.” I told him we just love God because of all He’s done for us. This led into the message of the Gospel. I was scared he would turn on me, but the opposite happened. He calmed down and discussed his troubles with me. I pray God uses that conversation to change his heart and show him the hope we have in Christ.
Ultimately there is nothing that can happen to me, my husband, or my children that is outside of God’s will. He loves them more than I do, and His care is greater than mine ever will be. If I truly believe this, I will be okay when facing the most daunting trials. And even if the Lord chooses to handle things differently than I wish, I must rest in knowing it is all for my best, for my children’s best, and for my husband’s best.
“And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.” Romans 8:28
“For the Lord takes pleasure in His people; He will beautify the humble with salvation. Let the saints be joyful in glory; let them sing aloud on their beds.
Let the high praises of God be in their mouth, and a two-edged sword in their hand” Psalm 149:4-6
“Our soul waits for the Lord;
He is our help and our shield. For our heart shall rejoice in Him, because we have trusted in His holy name. Let Your mercy, O Lord, be upon us, just as we hope in You.” Psalm 33:20-22
Father, thank You for always being for those who follow You wholeheartedly. May I never forget that You alone are my salvation. Please help me to be passionate about sharing the news of this salvation with others. May I rest in Your plan for me and my family. In Jesus’ name I pray, amen.